TV Week: Hell's Kitchen, Tonight's The Night and Britain's Got Talent
By Dan OwenHELL'S KITCHEN is back: bigger and better? Well, not quite. Cash-strapped ITV have had to tighten their purse strings for this new series, so it's not quite as decadent as previous years.
Chef Marco Pierre White is back, but the celebs are of lower caliber (yes, that is possible), everyone gets a basic fee, the ingredients aren't as expensive, and the fake restaurant itself now only seats 50 people to serve. It's a far cry from the big-budget US version, which retains original chef Gordon Ramsey, but never bothered with the celebrity element...
So, who's manning the stoves? There's former Blue Peter presenter Anthea Turner (a vapid schoolgirl beyond her years), her husband Grant Bovey (er, he boxed Ricky Gervais for charity once), actor Jody Latham from Shameless (annoying layabout), comedian Ade Edmondson (likeable, amusing), Liverpool goalkeeping legend Bruce Grobbelaar (am I alone in being surprised he's South African?), Gary Linekar's much younger fiancé Danielle Bux (imagine a thin version of Peep Show's Sophie), Dynasty actress Linda Evans (looking like Mickey Rourke's mother), and Niomi McLean-Daley (singer Miss Dynamite to everyone outside her family.) Claudia Winkleman replaces Angus Deayton as host (at White's insistence, apparently), and certainly improved as the week progressed after a bad start. She's still a bit too kooky, though, and best-suited to shows that give her some leeway to be a bit crazy. Hell's Kitchen is too straight for her, although I'm amused whenever she tries her cutesy little girl act inches away from White's enormous head.
Speaking of whom, Marco Pierre White returns for his second year as Head Chef, fresh back from the US where his cooking series Chopping Block was, well, given the chop. He's still the best reason to watch, too; a ridiculous figure in many ways, with his checkered slipon shoes, huge bandana, face like a bag of billiard balls, and lilting posh accent. But, y'know what, I like him. He's like the stern schoolteacher everyone had, who you can't help but respect because he treated you like an adult at the age of 14.
White may lack the volatile charisma of Ramsey (actually his protégé, once upon a time), but I personally feel Ramsey has been overexposed for a good five years now. The US version of Hell's Kitchen may have bigger stakes, bigger budgets and a more regular diet of swearing whenever Ramsey blows a gasket every five minutes, but Marco's a bit more... well, intriguing. Quieter, scarier, dry-witted, but also preposterous and caricatured in his own unique way. To be honest, the whole notion that kitchens are a battlefield and chefs are the Generals has always made me stifle a giggle. Sure, there are hot plates, knives, stress and shouting, but it always strikes me as an environment that's just exaggerated by the people that work there. Marco cuts an imposing figure... ratty eyes narrowed, despondent smirk, knife clutched behind his back, turning to his staff of Z-list celebs, only to bark: "One fish, one veal, one risotto!" It kinda kills the image. ITV1, VARIOUS.
Of all the menaces Russell T. Davies has unleashed on us in Doctor Who, perhaps the most insidious has been actor John Barrowman. The musical theatre star attempted a TV career in the '90s (with Live & Kicking and The Movie Game), but proved unpopular. Playing Captain Jack in Doctor Who and Torchwood changed all that, and now he's a ubiquitous BBC presence. TONIGHT'S THE NIGHT is his latest entertainment vehicle; a clear update of Jim'll Fix It, with elements of The Generation Game, Surprise Surprise, and Britain's Got Talent.
Given his background, all of the surprises are in some way tied to singing, dancing or performance art. Barrowman (singing "I'm So Excited" as his big opening), is undoubtedly charismatic and brings a lot of passion and energy to everything he does, but it's an upbeat, cheesy attitude that can irritate naturally contemptuous British audiences. I know Barrowman's of Glaswegian descent, but his childhood in American hasn't just landed him that accent, he's clearly transatlantic in his attitude.
Your reaction to Tonight's The Night will largely rest on your tolerance for J.B's mega-watt over-enthusiasm, it has to be said. But, looking beyond Barrowman's broad and relentlessly upbeat presenting style, this melting pot of variety TV managed a few decent moments -- best of which was four boys who have their own band ("My Kid Brother"), who got to watch their idols McFly perform live, only for their delight to turn to horror when their mum descended from the rafters strumming a guitar to rock out with them. Just watch the kids' jaws drop, as visions of playground taunting for years to come wash across their minds.
The rest? Well, a bald man tried to contain his lust during a surprise appearance by Welsh warbler Katherine Jenkins; a dad was challenged to learn how to Cossack dance; a freestyle football challenge between Barrowman and Matt Dawson (J.B won the studio vote, despite being terrible); a chubby hairdresser performed with the cast of Hairspray (she was fairly good, too); two groups of work colleagues engaged in a head-to-head singing battle, and a few others. All were mildly entertaining, but only the aforementioned McFly surprise contained a tinge of embarrassment to take the edge of the cheesy, derivative air that the show can't shake. Still, it's a traditional Saturday night show that wasn't too cynical, and Barrowman's broad fanbase should ensure some interest ratings-wise. Just don't schedule it against Britain's Got Talent, because it can't compete -- even if it's commendably not laughing at deluded eccentrics. BBC1, SAT, 6.55PM
Speaking of the devil (and no, I don't mean Simon Cowell), BRITAIN'S GOT TALENT is back on ITV1 for its third series. But is the competion over before it's even begun? In the first week, 47-year-old Scottish virgin Susan Boyle became an overnight sensation thanks to her incongruous performance (face of a builder, voice of a angel), and she's become a worldwide sensation after 12 million hits on YouTube prompted appearances on US television. It's been great publicity for BGT, but it puts the show in an odd position very early. Who could possibly top the impact she's made? If she wins, it will be very deserved but the remainder of the series will have felt like going through the motions. If she loses, the actual winner won't be able to compete with Boyle's fame, and become the Gareth Gates to her Will Young for a year.
It probably doesn't matter, though. Nobody really watches BGT in the hope of seeing genuine talent get discovered; most people watch because it's like the auditions stage of the X Factor, only better, because it doesn't just feature bad singers. Although oddly, the singers are always better placed to win, because other entertainers don't have the range of material. The judges could go crazy for a stand-up comedian's routine, but would they be laughing in the next round if he only had those three minues of jokes and had to repeat them? And imagine the stony-faces if the comedian is forced to do the same material for a third time at the Royal Variety Performance after winning! No, singers or dancers will always have the upperhand, I feel. ITV1, SAT, 7.55PM.
.....
If you enjoyed TV Week, why not head over to Dan's Media Digest for more entertainment-related news, reviews and musings?
Speaking of whom, Marco Pierre White returns for his second year as Head Chef, fresh back from the US where his cooking series Chopping Block was, well, given the chop. He's still the best reason to watch, too; a ridiculous figure in many ways, with his checkered slipon shoes, huge bandana, face like a bag of billiard balls, and lilting posh accent. But, y'know what, I like him. He's like the stern schoolteacher everyone had, who you can't help but respect because he treated you like an adult at the age of 14.
White may lack the volatile charisma of Ramsey (actually his protégé, once upon a time), but I personally feel Ramsey has been overexposed for a good five years now. The US version of Hell's Kitchen may have bigger stakes, bigger budgets and a more regular diet of swearing whenever Ramsey blows a gasket every five minutes, but Marco's a bit more... well, intriguing. Quieter, scarier, dry-witted, but also preposterous and caricatured in his own unique way. To be honest, the whole notion that kitchens are a battlefield and chefs are the Generals has always made me stifle a giggle. Sure, there are hot plates, knives, stress and shouting, but it always strikes me as an environment that's just exaggerated by the people that work there. Marco cuts an imposing figure... ratty eyes narrowed, despondent smirk, knife clutched behind his back, turning to his staff of Z-list celebs, only to bark: "One fish, one veal, one risotto!" It kinda kills the image. ITV1, VARIOUS.
Of all the menaces Russell T. Davies has unleashed on us in Doctor Who, perhaps the most insidious has been actor John Barrowman. The musical theatre star attempted a TV career in the '90s (with Live & Kicking and The Movie Game), but proved unpopular. Playing Captain Jack in Doctor Who and Torchwood changed all that, and now he's a ubiquitous BBC presence. TONIGHT'S THE NIGHT is his latest entertainment vehicle; a clear update of Jim'll Fix It, with elements of The Generation Game, Surprise Surprise, and Britain's Got Talent.
Given his background, all of the surprises are in some way tied to singing, dancing or performance art. Barrowman (singing "I'm So Excited" as his big opening), is undoubtedly charismatic and brings a lot of passion and energy to everything he does, but it's an upbeat, cheesy attitude that can irritate naturally contemptuous British audiences. I know Barrowman's of Glaswegian descent, but his childhood in American hasn't just landed him that accent, he's clearly transatlantic in his attitude.
Your reaction to Tonight's The Night will largely rest on your tolerance for J.B's mega-watt over-enthusiasm, it has to be said. But, looking beyond Barrowman's broad and relentlessly upbeat presenting style, this melting pot of variety TV managed a few decent moments -- best of which was four boys who have their own band ("My Kid Brother"), who got to watch their idols McFly perform live, only for their delight to turn to horror when their mum descended from the rafters strumming a guitar to rock out with them. Just watch the kids' jaws drop, as visions of playground taunting for years to come wash across their minds.
The rest? Well, a bald man tried to contain his lust during a surprise appearance by Welsh warbler Katherine Jenkins; a dad was challenged to learn how to Cossack dance; a freestyle football challenge between Barrowman and Matt Dawson (J.B won the studio vote, despite being terrible); a chubby hairdresser performed with the cast of Hairspray (she was fairly good, too); two groups of work colleagues engaged in a head-to-head singing battle, and a few others. All were mildly entertaining, but only the aforementioned McFly surprise contained a tinge of embarrassment to take the edge of the cheesy, derivative air that the show can't shake. Still, it's a traditional Saturday night show that wasn't too cynical, and Barrowman's broad fanbase should ensure some interest ratings-wise. Just don't schedule it against Britain's Got Talent, because it can't compete -- even if it's commendably not laughing at deluded eccentrics. BBC1, SAT, 6.55PM
Speaking of the devil (and no, I don't mean Simon Cowell), BRITAIN'S GOT TALENT is back on ITV1 for its third series. But is the competion over before it's even begun? In the first week, 47-year-old Scottish virgin Susan Boyle became an overnight sensation thanks to her incongruous performance (face of a builder, voice of a angel), and she's become a worldwide sensation after 12 million hits on YouTube prompted appearances on US television. It's been great publicity for BGT, but it puts the show in an odd position very early. Who could possibly top the impact she's made? If she wins, it will be very deserved but the remainder of the series will have felt like going through the motions. If she loses, the actual winner won't be able to compete with Boyle's fame, and become the Gareth Gates to her Will Young for a year.It probably doesn't matter, though. Nobody really watches BGT in the hope of seeing genuine talent get discovered; most people watch because it's like the auditions stage of the X Factor, only better, because it doesn't just feature bad singers. Although oddly, the singers are always better placed to win, because other entertainers don't have the range of material. The judges could go crazy for a stand-up comedian's routine, but would they be laughing in the next round if he only had those three minues of jokes and had to repeat them? And imagine the stony-faces if the comedian is forced to do the same material for a third time at the Royal Variety Performance after winning! No, singers or dancers will always have the upperhand, I feel. ITV1, SAT, 7.55PM.
.....
If you enjoyed TV Week, why not head over to Dan's Media Digest for more entertainment-related news, reviews and musings?
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